The past several nights I have been waking up between 1:15Am-4:20Am.  I’ll be sound asleep, as far as I know, and then wake up as if I had dozed off at work or something.  I am suddenly WIDE AWAKE and my brain is ticking quickly.  Two nights ago when I woke up my brain was loudly singing a Chuck Berry song.
No Joke.  “RIDIN’ ALONG IN MY AUTOMOBILE/MY BABY BESIDE ME AT THE WHEEL”   AAAAAAAAHHHHH!
How the hell did THAT get in there??
Then I lay awake for hours thinking about how I should eat more salads and names that I like for future children (no I’m not pregnant nor plan to be any time soon).
Eventually I get up and read a book but I hate being a quitter and not falling back to sleep.  Sleeping is what I do best and if I can’t sleep I am nothing to this world.
I’m not sure why this is happening–although I’ve had  A LOT of time to think on it and I’m hypothesizing that I’ve done something wicked and therefore must not rest.
So….
I will offer a confession of my “sins” and maybe this purging will cure my insomnia.  (I’m only going back to when the insomnia started–not to childhood.  that list wouldn’t end)

1.  I was 20 minutes late for work a couple days ago (but I emailed my boss and told her)
2.  I ate taco bell last night, which is a personal sin against myself
3.  I flicked somebody off but I hid it
4.  I told my boyfriend I’d break up with him if he didn’t quit working for someone I hate
5.  I bought a pair of jeans from JCPenny
6.  I drink wine nonstop
7.  I tivo Extreme Makeover: Home Edition
8.  I read Twilight and told everyone I hated it but I secretly liked it
9.  I bought a wedding gift for a friend and didn’t wrap it–I gave it to her in a Target bag
10.  I liked stabbing the bus driver with the epi-pen
11.  I lied to someone and said I liked their blouse but really it looked like barf

*Shew* okay, I hope tonight I will drool relentlessly in a shameless coma now that I’ve purged my sins.